Maxine

Since being on holiday I’ve felt very comfortable and very relaxed with the locals.  Naively I let a lot of my guards down and subconsciously decided that since I’m on vacation I can trust everyone.  It’s a silly thing to think and if my mom is reading this I know she’s cringing.  Someone recently told me that our greatest strengths are our greatest weaknesses and that has been true for me: I’m naturally incredibly trusting and sadly have had to learn that people must earn our trust.  I don’t believe that’s how it should be but unfortunately it’s the way it is.

So in my trusting I’m-on-holiday!-frame-of-mind, I’ve been strolling around without a care in the world for hours at a time.  Yesterday while on an exceptionally long walk, I began getting worried as I entered an area I hadn’t yet visited and the number of honks per minute was drastically increasing.  A beat up car soon pulled onto the path where I was walking – essentially blocking part of the way.  Two very greasily sketchy, I can’t put it any more kindly – dirty looking guys were in the vehicle.  The one closest to me opened his door and told me to get in.  I was so frightened I don’t remember exactly what I said because I went into semi-survival mode and yelled (yes, moomy, you’d be happy to know I did yell) a series of expletives so that my “no” was made quite clear.  I’m not prone to cussing but certain situations call for it and ladies, if an unknown male invites you to get into a car with him, I think it’s appropriate to set manners aside.  I’m really grateful that I didn’t have to get any more forceful with my no.  They asked if I was sure, I reiterated my stance, and they drove off.  But this encounter left me shaken up.  The silly sense of security I’ve had since being here was cracked a bit but determined to continue with my walk, on I went.

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In my last blog I talked about how friendly everyone has been here and how accommodating the bus drivers have been.  I failed to mention that all these friendly bus drivers have been males.  I’ve had no problem with finding buses to get to destinations in plenty of time and encouraging the bus to take me a bit off route.  Today was different.  I had a Pilates session at 11am and at 10:35am I was still walking and knew I wouldn’t make it by 11am.  I didn’t think it would be a problem so started waiting for a bus.  And waiting.  And waiting.  By 10:50am, 0 buses had passed (I later found out that they were still on “vacation” – on the 27^th?!).  I was about to go into a business and ask for a ride (hey, I was desperate to get to Pilates) when I saw a bus coming!  I asked if it could take me (it was a bit of a detour from the regular route) and she said no!  I couldn’t believe it!  I offered to pay double, then triple and still nothing.  I told her I was going to be late if she didn’t take me and clearly she felt nothing even remotely close to sympathy and drove off.  I was stunned.  Were all of the other bus drivers so accommodating because they were male?

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In just 2 days, a lot of what I have been loving about the people here was being challenged. 

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I turned around and noticed a lady smoking a cigarette.  I asked her about the buses and told her I’d been standing waiting for awhile and was worried I’d miss my 11am appointment.  Without hesitation she offered to drive me.  Along the way we had a lovely conversation.  Maxine is a local who chatted with me about her children and the changes she’s seen in her 30+ years of living here.  She referred to me as “doll” and “baby” and I instantly liked her.  She talked of times back when mosquitos killed the cows.  I wasn’t completely sure of what this line meant but she repeated it multiple times so I think it was an important takeaway point.  I was kind of so in awe of the whole scenario that seeking clarification would have taken away from this incredible moment.  Maxine wouldn’t accept payment so I’ll be taking her something by to thank her before I leave town.  More importantly than getting me to Pilates at 10:59am, Maxine was a beautiful reminder that it’s okay to get into some strangers’ cars.  In other words, be discerning with those we trust.  I will be offering more strangers rides because of Maxine – she was a beacon of light today.

Maxine also served as a great reminder that I love people.  As much as I adore being alone, I really enjoy having honest conversations with people who smile from their heart.  You can feel heart smiles and people with heart smiles make me happy.  She was a nice intermission for my solo vacation.

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I’d like to go back to my observation of the friendly bus drivers who have all been male.  There’s a great chance I’m going to find out that their kindness had nothing to do with them being male and me being female.  I laughed while waiting for the bus today because it made me remember the following story:

Tarrytown is a wealthier area of Austin with full service gas stations.  For years I was committed to buying gas from one of these gas stations because of how “nice” they were – they always chatted with me, washed my windows, pumped my gas, and checked my tire pressure.  I loved their friendliness and commitment to customer service so I wanted to support their business.  I had a friend in the car with me one day when the light came on signaling that my tank was low in fuel.  I started raving about this gas station and went out of my way to drive there.  Laughingly and kindly he let me know it wasn’t a “friendly” gas station but a “full service” one.  I. Was. Shocked.!!!!  I had no idea!  I found it hilarious but also don’t feel the need to pay extra on my gasoline.  I’m happy to clean my own windows. 

Like I said, there’s a possibility I’m going to learn something about the bus system that will make it all make sense.  Maybe not.  Either way I’m good with it – I will remember all of these experiences forever.  A lovely end to my 30^th year.